Friday, March 11, 2011

Retail Love

I couldn't stand to be an attractive young girl in a retail situation. I've worked a lot of retail, and every girl I know has horror stories about being creepily hit on. Hell, I'm a chubby nerd, and I used to get hit on by middle aged women. Then Twilight came out. I guess I'm not much of an Edward or Jacob. Hell, I'm team cupcakes.

At the convenience store/ gas station that I work now, there's a black girl named Jessica. She's cute, and is constantly being hit on. One guy just stared at her for a while. Just a creepy white dude in his late forties. Standing at her register, looking at her. Finally, Jessica asked “Can I help you with anything?”

“I came in, saw you, and forgot what I came in for.” Creepo replied.

I laughed. Really? An attractive woman made you completely forget what you had come in to buy? You can see attractive women literally every whee you go. Except Kentucky. See, he must have been from Kentucky. It all fits now. But seriously, a good looking girl makes you forget what you wanted? I would have to go up to a checkout and see a freakin' leprechaun manning the register to forget what I wanted.

“Holy crap.” I would say. “It's a leprechaun. I cannot even remember what I came in to buy.”

“I will take these Lucky Charms though.”

Another guy came in and was hitting on Jessica, trying to get her to come out on his motorcycle with him. He was middle aged, fat, with a long beard and a bandanna. Not exactly what a young African American girl is interested, I imagine. Jessica kindly turns him down, the man accepts defeat, and pulls out his wallet to pay for his items.

His wallet was adorned with a rebel flag.


No one owns a rebel flag adorned anything without having at least ten times referred to black people with the N word. You do not get to pick and choose if you're a racists. You can't only like the pretty ones, people.

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